“Why getting married should need a lot of money and expensive, while divorce is cheap? While, Allah SWT encourages a woman and a man to get married (for good purpose of course), and hates divorce.” - Ustad Jefry, a prominent religious among Indonesians
I definitely agree with his statement, although I’m still not in the stage where I can think about my own marriage. So many couple postpone to get married, since everyone mostly think that it is associated with wedding and celebration. Even luxury and dazzling decoration. Thus, they have to collect a lot of money first, then get married and celebrate.
Personally, I will ask this, what is the difference betweeen “Getting married” and “Wedding”? For me, who is very limited in terms knowledge of anything, would say that first, getting married is more to alteration of status from single to married. Second, getting married is when relationship between a woman and a man is legalised, and within followed by responsibility and long term commitment. While, wedding, is a celebration of getting married.
Can you see which is the term stating the essence of the bond between a man and a woman?
I am a Moslem. In Islam, there are specific requirements when a couple wants to get married:
1.) The man; a Moslem, mature, not insane, do not have more than 4 wives, etc.
2.) The woman; a Moslem, not a wife of another man, etc.
3.) The process of getting married, called “Akad Nikah”, which all of required attendees confirmed the vows of the couple
4.) Leader of the process of getting married, called “Wali” (have to be a male), where usually comes from the family or prominent person, etc.
5.) and 2 witnesses
Imagine, this process would not take more than an hour and the cost will be not more than serving foods and beverages for the attendees. But soon after, you are legally becoming a wife and a husband of one another.
While the wedding or the celebration, only aim to celebrate and inviting people who the couple or the family knows well. If we take the positive side, it could be the place for reuniting and deepening the relationship of families, friends, colleagues, etc. But, it will take more cost. If the couple of the family doesn’t have sufficient money to celebrate the wedding, it would not fail the marriage, since its not in getting married process requirement.